How Valuable Am I?

Back to work after a long Christmas holiday….and I didn’t want to go.

I have a seriously bad attitude.  After the bonus reduction, I don’t want to do anything.  However, in order not to burn any bridges (especially a 20 year bridge), I’m trying to be as  professional as possible.  I’m also the kind of person who needs to do their best always.

However, I’m taking the next month or so to collect information for my new resume.  I sometimes forget how much I do! 

For example, today I spoke to a client in Washington about moving a trip for our technical team back a week.  I helped someone work on getting a Top Secret security clearance for a new consultant.  I did some accounting work.  I pulled together a basic Contractual Joint Venture Agreement for a company we’re working with.  I worked with our Tech Manager to get a new Web tool initialized for a big new contract.  I did some cost accounting on a development project.  I had our receptionist pull together a list of potential consultants for our Sales team to contact.  I spoke with a coworker who is off because her mother is dying.  I spoke to our Banker about a corporate acquisition (still need to call the lawyer).  I organized attendance at an association meeting we would like staff to attend.  I arranged to have our accounting data sent to our accountant who will be in on Monday to start reviewing for financial statements…..

The list of things is endless.  I forget how much I do.  And then my confidence drops and I wonder if I have anything of value to contribute to a possible new employer.

In fact, sometimes I can’t believe the things I’m doing.  I occasionally wonder if people will figure out that I’m way in over my head and I have no idea what I’m doing.  Apparently, it’s a very common thing and is called “Impostor Syndrome”.    I looked it up here.

I’ll continue to work on collecting data and then I’m going to seriously look for a new job.

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Filed under career, job, maturity, money, Uncategorized

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